World Domination
Have you ever noticed how every year Christmas seems to be celebrated earlier and earlier in November? This year Non stop Christmas music started playing on one of the local radio stations two weeks before Thanksgiving!!! Decorations and trees start going up in all the department stores…and not to mention those wonderful neighbors that decide to put up their Christmas decorations and lights the first of November (I’ve never understood why it is always the Griswald family…the one with the tacky Santa’s and inflatable yard toys??)
Well I have an answer to why every year it seems to get earlier – or at least a theory – Evil Cheery Holiday Elves!! I believe they are out there in human form… strategically placed in our cities and their main goal is to eventually have world domination – CHRISTMAS YEAR ROUND!!!!
I noticed this couple of years ago on Black Friday. Think about it - thousands of people go shopping on this one day of the year. People wake up at 4:00am and wait in line in the cold to get these special Christmas sales... You and I both know there is no way the customer service workers can be that cheery after dealing with crabby customers all day long….it is just not normal.
When you walk into Wal-Mart this time of year, who do you almost always come in contact with?? The Wal-Mart greeter – and have you noticed how chirpy they are while sporting their Wal-Mart vest and holiday pin!! Uh huh, it’s an evil cheery holiday elf!
How about when you open the sales papers on Sunday morning and start seeing all the great Christmas advertisements that cause all of this mad chaos….someone, somewhere had to decide to advertise that as a “BUY ONE GET ONE HALF OFF HOLIDAY SALE ONLY!!!” - Evil Cheery Holiday Elf, maybe??
Or…the one person in your office that has started playing Christmas music a little too soon for comfort. They have already started planning the holiday office meal and holiday party and you haven’t even bought candy for the trick or treaters yet!!! Yeah, you know who I’m talking about!!
These people may not be vertically challenged with pointy ears…but that’s the point, they blend in with the rest of society… (other than the fact they have a twinkle in their eye year round and smell of apple cider.) They are walking around in human form trying to brainwash us into the Christmas spirit. It’s almost like you snap…one minute you are going about your everyday routine and then BAM suddenly you are walking around with a cheesy holiday grin, listening to silent night, and dressing up your pets in reindeer antlers. If this continues eventually we will be walking around in July wearing tacky Christmas bathing suits!
Well I have an answer to why every year it seems to get earlier – or at least a theory – Evil Cheery Holiday Elves!! I believe they are out there in human form… strategically placed in our cities and their main goal is to eventually have world domination – CHRISTMAS YEAR ROUND!!!!
I noticed this couple of years ago on Black Friday. Think about it - thousands of people go shopping on this one day of the year. People wake up at 4:00am and wait in line in the cold to get these special Christmas sales... You and I both know there is no way the customer service workers can be that cheery after dealing with crabby customers all day long….it is just not normal.
When you walk into Wal-Mart this time of year, who do you almost always come in contact with?? The Wal-Mart greeter – and have you noticed how chirpy they are while sporting their Wal-Mart vest and holiday pin!! Uh huh, it’s an evil cheery holiday elf!
How about when you open the sales papers on Sunday morning and start seeing all the great Christmas advertisements that cause all of this mad chaos….someone, somewhere had to decide to advertise that as a “BUY ONE GET ONE HALF OFF HOLIDAY SALE ONLY!!!” - Evil Cheery Holiday Elf, maybe??
Or…the one person in your office that has started playing Christmas music a little too soon for comfort. They have already started planning the holiday office meal and holiday party and you haven’t even bought candy for the trick or treaters yet!!! Yeah, you know who I’m talking about!!
These people may not be vertically challenged with pointy ears…but that’s the point, they blend in with the rest of society… (other than the fact they have a twinkle in their eye year round and smell of apple cider.) They are walking around in human form trying to brainwash us into the Christmas spirit. It’s almost like you snap…one minute you are going about your everyday routine and then BAM suddenly you are walking around with a cheesy holiday grin, listening to silent night, and dressing up your pets in reindeer antlers. If this continues eventually we will be walking around in July wearing tacky Christmas bathing suits!
This entry was posted
on Tuesday, November 24, 2009 at Tuesday, November 24, 2009.
